Factual Post Alert (FPA)—not to be confused with the news alerts, updates, bulletins, and social media posts which most of us depend on to keep ourselves informed.
Maine’s violent crime rate is holding steady at the bottom of the list of all 50 states. The bottom being the optimum spot in this case.
PS. Vermont is at 49th and New Hampshire is at 48th. This indicates you can come to New England to gander at foliage without much worry of being attacked for no reason.
Please, if you are from away, orange pumpkins placed in yards and porches are not a gift from the locals. We tend to decorate with the gargantuan gourds. Only pumpkins designated as “For Sale” are available for pick-up.
I say that in order to maintain our surprisingly low violent crime rate. People tend to get upset when you help yourself to their pumpkins. Keep it in mind.
Additionally, if you see a pile of leaves beside the roadway, do not drive through them in order to recreate delightful childhood memories of plunging into piles of leaves (PIPOL).
Some locals have been seen hiding their larger pumpkins within the pile of leaves in order to dissuade folks from driving through the piles of leaves in order to recreate their childhood memories.
Large, hidden pumpkins (sometimes other refuse such as concrete blocks have been hidden as well) wreak havoc on sheet metal and suspension parts.
Leave the leaves alone. It takes a long time to rake a great pile and we don’t take kindly to random acts of violence—even if it’s focused on deceased foliage.
Factual factoids are backed up with documentation—seen below— from U.S. News and World Report- a new twist in social media.
Keep your hands to yourself, leave other people’s things alone, and be kind to one another.
Enjoy your Tuesday.
We will be here.
This post was originally published on October 8, 2018 on Bangor Maine Police Department Facebook page.